The woman I have fallen in love with doesn’t want to walk that path with me. (Sigh)
She has been with men who have tried to control her, and she lost the essence of herself with them. And she’s afraid that she might hurt my soul if we were together.
It’s so quiet as I let these words wash over me. There is something sacred hanging in the air, far broader than the journeys of two human beings. There is an opening to the mystery that is love.
Right now I do not know. The tomorrows will probably be as uncertain … and I smile at the thought. I am being taken aloft by the wings of tenderness, tossed and turned in a dark sky.
Sarah McLachlan, in her song Angel, nuzzled my life this morning – the loss of touch, of looking into, of sighing together:
There's always some reason
To feel not good enough
And it's hard at the end of the day
Oh, this human life is so often hard! We do our best to be happy and sometimes demons come knocking on our door. All of us.
In the arms of the angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
What if it’s all like this, forever and ever? Reaching out to touch the sublime, and the fingertips just falling short. We want to be warmed and to have marvelous paintings adorning our walls. What if that never comes to pass?
And yet there is this:
Oh this glorious sadness
That brings me to my knees
Life is so big
There is so much we don’t know
Bring on all the Tuesdays, all the Fridays … all that will unfold