That’s Me!

A week ago, I told you about being interviewed by Carolyne concerning my experience in the Evolutionary Collective. I compared this discussion with the only other interview I’ve ever done, way back in the 80’s. I was so nervous then and so comfy now.

Quite quickly, Carolyne e-mailed me the link to the 15-minute video. I saw all these strange numbers and letters. No matter … it’s just a single click.

I didn’t click. “Tomorrow.”

Guess what? The day after that one was tomorrow. “Too busy. I’ll get to it.”

Life seems to arrange things so that one tomorrow is followed by another, and then one more, none of which included a viewing of the interview.

Okay, Bruce. What’s going on? I might have written that I enjoyed talking about the EC, but as my mom used to say: “The proof of the pudding is in the eating.” Guess I haven’t been too hungry. Could f-e-a-r have anything to do with this? Yes, indeed. Apparently a transformation to ease doesn’t mean I want to see my body on display.

This morning, I gently berated myself and then clicked. There I was in my red shirt, with a white door as background. I stared. Then Carolyne asked a question. I enjoyed watching myself reply. “This guy’s okay.”

Minutes later, I started laughing at something I was saying onscreen. Then more laughter. “This guy’s pretty funny.”

The me of February 10 was giggling in response to the me of February 1. Weird! And wonderful.

My mouth gaped
My soul sang
My toes tapped

Life is good


Yes, that’s what happened to me yesterday … for the second time in my life.

Back in the 80’s, I worked with a psychologist in Lethbridge, Alberta. We led personal development seminars and Joel was a great coach. I was a newbie, a 30-something guy armed with some knowledge of communication skills but definitely lacking in life experience.

Our local TV station got wind of the work we were doing and wanted their viewers to hear about it too. My memory is that Joel had done many of these interviews and suggested that I give it a go. Tremblingly, I agreed.

On the day of public reveal, I put on my ill-fitting brown suit and headed downtown. The chairs in the studio were comfy, unlike me. The woman asking the questions did her best to settle me down but sadly I fumbled my way along the path of vague answers and big gaps of silence. Here I was, a seminar leader with prolonged descending self-esteem.

I watched the complimentary copy of the video once, cringing at regular intervals. I felt like a teenager with a face full of acne.


Okay, that was a long ago then. Yesterday was a totally different now. Carolyne, the Program Director of the Evolutionary Collective, was interviewing me online. Our work is an exploration of consciousness, and a leaning into the future to glimpse where evolution may be carrying us. More than anything, we intend to bring more love into the world.

I’ve been doing the 1-1 mutual awakening practice with many people over the past one-and-a-half years. Usually there’s a vivid meeting of the eyes as we melt into each other.

It was 1:45, fifteen minutes before interview time. I’m sitting in my room at a Toronto bed and breakfast … with a big smile on my face. Instead of a brown suit, I’m wearing a bright red shirt and jeans. Instead of swallowing every thirty seconds, I’m flying free.

Carolyne asked me a whole bunch of questions about the impact the EC has had on me. I didn’t care what she asked. I was too busy laughing about I don’t remember what. There was no planning to my answers, no strategy. Things just seemed to bubble up. Plus I was in no hurry to say anything. I felt great trust that the words coming out of my mouth would be true and helpful to future viewers.

Carolyne and I giggled a lot as our time together flew by. If I knew any communication skills, I couldn’t remember them. She and I were together … that was the only important thing. Our eyes met.


So how can this be?
Well, 35 years must have something to do with it
I’ve learned a lot and forgotten what I’ve needed to forget
I’m more of Bruce than I used to be
Thank you, life