Yesterday I had the opportunity of a lifetime to experience something that had never come my way before.  It was just after the dinner break of our Evolutionary Collective Core retreat on Zoom.

My chicken, rice and peanut sauce meal was not doing well in my stomach and some of it was lingering in my esophagus.

And there I am, one of 67 video tiles on my screen (and everyone else’s).  Vomit approaching.

No!  Not in front of all these people.

When I’m in these meetings, my face usually feels pretty fluid.  If someone says something funny, I laugh.  If I agree with a comment, I’ll nod or say something to the speaker (which of course no one can hear, since I’m muted).

Not yesterday after the break.  My face was stone.  I wonder if anyone noticed.  Probably not.

As the upchuck came closer, I turned off my video and texted the meeting host about the possibility of the moment.  Then I turned the video back on.

I was teetering on an edge, and I chose to stay in the meeting, stay visible.  That makes me happy.

Shortly thereafter, we were put in groups of three to discuss something.  One of the principles in the EC is to stay close to whatever is emerging in the moment, and express that to the person(s) you’re practicing with.  So I did that.  And my companions held me.

***

No onscreen explosion

The nausea passed

The Me was surrounded by the We