I was riding the train in Toronto today – the UP Express. I love the train, with its big windows giving me a chance to look out at the world. I see into people’s backyards and wonder what lives are being led on the other side of their windows. I watch a long string of cars waiting at a red light for their left turn … and feel sad for the folks inside. Life passes me by.
Today was different. I grabbed the last remaining window seat but there was a partition right in front of me. All I had to see out from was a sliver of vertical glass. My eyes tensed up as images came by too fast. I couldn’t linger on anything, and lingering is truly one of life’s pleasures.
And I thought of other things:
What would it be like to have no peripheral vision, just a small circle in the middle for focusing on things?
What would it be like to have a moderate hearing loss, where you can only catch a few words from each sentence?
What would it be like to have the beginning of Alzheimer’s, and you just can’t remember the names of those near and dear?
What would it be like to have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and be racked with terror in the middle of the night?
What would not be touched by a narrowed life? What essence of me would still be there? And could I find it?
In August, 2018, my life is expansive. In August, 2019, it may not be. It’s time to feel into what will always be there.