The Buddha was a pretty smart guy.  My favourite ideas of his are called the Brahma Viharas.  These are four ways of living which together contribute to other human beings, and if practiced, shower great happiness on you.  Simple ideas, but not simple to live day-to-day.

I’ve grappled with these qualities for many years, to have them be my automatic response to life, requiring no effort.  I’ve had some moments of success and many periods of being unconscious to their beauty.  It’s a remarkable journey.

The first is lovingkindness.  Just as it sounds.  “Be ye kind.”  “Love them all.”  Of course, it’s easy to love some folks, the ones who are friendly and upbeat.  But what about those who have been mean to me, who have tried to stifle my aliveness?  In my better moments, love flows naturally from me to them.  At those times, I don’t feel angry at them for the injustice.  Instead I’m sad, thinking about the rotten karma they’re creating for themselves.  I believe the energy that each of us puts out into the world eventually makes its way back to us, in this case causing great pain.  I don’t want that for the ones who have hurt me.  They too deserve love.  “Hatred never ends through hatred.  By non-hate alone does it end.”

Compassion is the second trait.  Sometimes, when I see sadness in another, or low self-esteem, or physical pain, I feel my heart opening, and the “shimmering down” of energy inside me begins.  There are so many people who seem overwhelmed with the curve balls of life.  On our trips into St. Thomas, we pass the entrance to a psychiatric hospital.  In good weather, several patients are outside, sitting on the curb, some smoking.  I can feel the anguish.  It makes me sad.  There is a practice called tonglen, which asks me to breathe in the pain of others and breathe out goodness.  It seems like a self-destructive thing to do, but it has brought me great peace.

Altruistic joy is my favourite among the four.  Some writers refer to it as sympathetic joy, but that doesn’t ring true for me.  It suggests feeling sorry for someone.  I think altruism is a marvelous word … it’s not about me.  The Buddha taught that it’s possible to feel delight when faced with the good fortune of another person.  When I’ve experienced this quality, I just feel so light.  One time years ago, Jody and I were walking in Stanley Park, near the entrance to the Vancouver Aquarium.  I didn’t think we had the money to go in there, an attitude of deficit that has never served me.  On the flip side, though, I was astonished to see how happy I was for the folks paying the fee and going inside.  I still remember that vividly.  And I usually smile to myself when I see happiness in front of me.

Equanimity is the fourth trait … to let whatever comes my way be all right.  “Welcome everything.”  If I’m experiencing a difficult situation, I can work at improving it in the future, but right now what you see is what you get.  Can I feel fine when someone I love is enjoying the company of another person, rather than mine?  Can I forgive myself for the financial mistakes I’ve made?  Can I see all parts of the roller coaster as part of the trip?  I think so.

These four are a pretty good place to call home.  It’s okay to be on vacation for short spells, but home is where I belong.